Wednesday, December 10, 2008


Have you ever had a memory from your younger days that came at you from out of the blue? It happened to me today as I was driving home from getting groceries. I believe it was a defining moment in my life.

It happened about 30 years ago when I was 15 or 16 and my friend was 13 or 14. I walked to her house to get her so we could go hang out. When I arrived at her house, her father met me at the door and walked me back to her room. A bit unusual, but I had no idea what was coming. When we entered her room, her dad picked up a pack of cigarettes and said to me, "are these yours?". They weren't. I had a split second to make my decision whether I was going to throw my friend under the bus and let her get beat up by her abusive father, or if I was going to take the blame for her and take the chance that her father would tell my father and I could be beat up by my abusive father. I glanced at her face and knew I had to take my chances. When I saw the look of terror there, I saw myself. I said to him, "Yes, I asked her to hold them for me. I'm sorry.". He walked over to me, handed me her cigarettes, and walked out of the room.

I knew I did the right thing.

It was the moment I knew who I'd become.

And he never did tell my father...


Rhonda said...

Wow, what a moment of decision. I am so sorry to hear of the "abusive" fathers and that makes me so incredibly sad.

I have just awarded you the "fabulous blog" award. You are my hero, one hell of a mom and you always make me smile.

Hugs, Rhonda

Terry said...

Flashbacks from childhood hit me all the time, but I still think it's strange when it happens.

Glad you made the right decision for your friend and sorry to hear about the abusive fathers.

You rock!

Baby John's Crib said...

That was a very cool thing you did!

Lisa said...

That made me get teary. Do you still have contact with that friend? I wonder how she remembers it and what you did.

You're a special person, T.